Funny SMS

20% of the population is now drinking coffee, 60% is having sex, 19% is watching television and one yokel is now holding his mobile in his hand

A woman likes to have four animals in the house: a jaguar in front of the doorway, a fox in the closet, a bull in bed, and a numbskulll to pay for this all.

At this moment i have a déjà vu and a loss of memory at the same time. I thin I have forgotten this before.

Be friendly with your kids, they choose your home when you are old!

BEEB! Send this message to 5 of your friends and you will have unbelieveble sex tonight! If you break this chain, you’ll never have multiple orgasm again!

Birdy birdy in the sky, left a poopie in my eye. Me don’t care, me don’t cry, me just happy that a cow can’t fly!!

Braindetector activated, calibrating, now searching………still searching……get a good grip of your mobile….still searching…….no brains found

Did I not see you yesterday at the mall, with a grey jacket? No? O, than it was a rubbish bag after all! .

Do not disturb, I am enough disturbed as it is . . .

Don’t feel sad, don’t feel glue, Einstein was ugly too !

E man pays $.2,00 for a $.1,00 item that he needs, a woman pays $.1,00 for $.2,00 item that she does not need.

Excessive use of alcohol can lead to a pregnancy.

For you I would go as far as the end of the world. Do you promise to stay here ?”

God created the earth, God created the woods, God created you too, but yes, even God makes mistakes!

God created the universe, the earth, nature, the eggs, man and saw that it was good and beautiful. God also created woman and thought : ‘I hope she will make herself up’!

HALLO, this is your mobile. There is no particular problem. I just wanted to leave your pocket, want the smell is unbearable!!!

Hello I am a virus and I am entering your brain right now….. sorry I will leave, I can’t find a brain.

Hello, this is GOD. I make few bad creations but you are the worst monster I ever realised. My apologies on behalf of the whole world..

How would you like your egg for breakfast…. hard-boiled or impregnated?

I am a killer,I kill people for money…..But because you are my friend,I’ll kill you for nothing!